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![jnrafrv Random thoughts](https://evyshop.vn/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/jnrafrv.jpg)
Hello, World!
Finally, I have done it YAY. I started my own online dairy, and yes, on a freaking sex forum. Well, this wasn’t exactly what I had in mind. I wanted to have an actual personal blog, a real blog like those on blogspot, wordpress or tumblr. Wanting it is one thing, working for it is a completely different story. The idea has been on my mind for a few years but I never had the time for it. Okay maybe I’m making excuses but seriously, we all want a lot of things which we know we can’t have them all at the same time aren’t we? Sometimes I wish I have 240 hours a day or that I don’t have to spend my precious time on eating/sleeping… Whatever, I will keep going with what I have. I will make this little corner become my personal dairy where I will ramble about random stuff, some personal, some general, but all me.
So why here? I first stumbled upon this forum few years ago. I’m pretty sure it was “for academic purposes” if you know what I mean lol. Not much at that time, or maybe back then I didn’t know there is this corner here where people share more than just sex. Lately I catch myself being here more often, reading those personal dairy topics. Some are interesting. They have that unique point of view on everything in life. Some are more than interesting. They are complicated, and I like complicated people. They keep it going for years and when you finish reading it all at once, you should be astonished by how much one can change in just a few years. It’s like you got to live another life from someone else’s perspective. Well, it keeps me entertained so I guess you could say I like it here.
You may be wondering what the heck this guy is doing writing shit in English and such. My Vietnamese as mother tongue is bad, my English is worse and the only Japanese word I know is “kimochi”. Maybe language isn’t the best tool for communication. Maybe it’s language that prevents us from truly understand each other. Sooooooooooooooo whatever man. If you don’t like it then maybe it isn’t intended for you. I’m writing this so in 5 years when I look back, I can laugh at myself for how stupid and naïve I was. Please please please resist the urge to comment in this topic UNLESS you think you have an interesting perspective to share. I really don’t want people to flood my little corner with uninformative sentences. Else, you are all welcomed.
Somehow if you magically read all of that and made it here, I believe I made a remarkable first impression (good or bad). I hope you enjoy your time here.
Goodnight, World.
Alright,
Fuck rambling. So it was on the spur of the moment that I started this thing yesterday. Mostly because yesterday I finally finished my 2 months of intense studying for finals. Now I have to adapt to the new lifestyle of not-having-to-study. I woke up at lunch and spend the rest of the day in bed watching movies. Don’t judge me lol. Anyway, there was this movie which is quite interesting named “Split”. It’s a story about a man carrying 23 different identities inside one single biological body. Yes, I’m talking about Dissociative Identity Disorder or as a more well-known name as Multiple Personality Disorder. And there is also this psychiatrist who is an expert in the mentioned mental diseases and has been treating the man. What caught my attention was that scene where she talked about her belief of the mental condition not as an illness but more like a supernatural gift. Like they have this superpower which make them capable of doing thing we lowly peasants cannot. Like they are not patients but something else, something more evolved. She also said that DID patients have changed their body chemistry with their thoughts. Damn, I know it’s just another fictional movie thing but damn I really like the idea. It actually sounds familiar asf considering those things about positive mental attitude helps us to prevent mental illness that we read every day.
Well, so why did all of this come into my attention? Lmao this is so so wrong but it sounds like I noticed it because it made feel better about myself with my own social anxiety. Whatever, still it’s an interesting perspective I must say. A worth-watching movie so I would definitely recommend.
One last thing, my favorite quote in the movie
Goodnight.
Whats up my man. I like your writings, so I could not resist the urge to type some in your little corner here, my bad. I have social anxiety as well. But I dont think that im gifted. There was a time that i thought i was special, in a sense superior to others. As special as i was, i was not happy. Then I read Individual Psychology written by Alfred Adler, who basically said that I was just trying to hide my inferiority feelings. Hence, deep down i feel so insecure that I am afraid others will look at me and realize i suck. I figured that I genuinely dont want this social anxiety, not because it is evil, but because i just want to have the good feelings of having the confidence to talk to people, to impress some girls. My view point is disorders are what prevent us from living happily in the present socitey with its own rules and laws. If a person is happy, he/she is healthy. Thus, I am joyful that you like the way you are.
Well, of course there is always that someone who is better than you at a particular something. You don’t know everything he knows and of he doesn’t know everything you do (not to mention how “useful” these things are). If you think of it that way then every single individual on earth is unique. For me, I also realized you may do whatever tf you want and nobody actually cares. I mean they do to some extend but they also have their own problems to take care of. I feel like thinking too much about others or thinking so little of myself will just limit my potential of becoming what I want to be. Yes you are right, I like the way I am, not where I am but how I am heading to what I want.
Apparently, the thing about switching identity causing changes in body chemical wasn’t completely fictional after all. I did some reading and there are actually records showing that people with DID undergo biological changes by shifting between personalities. For example, they show different handwriting, different eye vision conditions or even different diseases/allergies. There is even a case where this girl has 98 freaking personalities and one of those is blind, but as she switches to another, she is not blind anymore. Just imagine the possibility it will bring about if we actually know how this works. Maybe DID shouldn’t be called a “mental illness” with such a negative view. Maybe that’s what we need to achieve perfection mentally and physically. Maybe it’s the next step of human evolution.
Well, what the fuck do I know? What am I even talking about? Obviously spending few hours reading Wikipedia and some psychology websites do not make me an expert. This scared me as I’m writing this because for one second I think I wished to have that DID thing. I mean I like new experiences, but the thought of losing my consciousness (the “me” in control) to someone/something else is so so so uncomfortable.
Interesting.
I like how you pretend to be on the other side and speak from that view point in order to help people realize there is always more than one part to the story.
But it’s disappointing when no one gets that isn’t it? Don’t you feel isolated when no one has a single freaking clue of what you are trying to do?
If only people can just put themselves in others’ shoes, there wouldn’t be so many misunderstandings…
Story time YAYYYYY…
When I was in high school, there was this girl who is the same age as me. She was the class president of the class next to mine. She wasn’t pretty but rather cute. She was smart. I wouldn’t call it exceptional but she was kinda a hard-working student so it obviously made her top of the class. And of course, as many other boys, I had a crush on her. It wasn’t anything special and well, I was young and shy so it went nowhere. But one time, I was stalking on her facebook and saw a status, something like this:
Sounds cool right? Of course that was what I thought. I mean I was young and had a crush on her, of course she is perfect in my eyes, that was deep, everything she said must be true because she was so cool blah blah… LOL. I don’t know why I was so obsessed with that sentence at that time. What do you think? Fast forward a few years, we left high school and went different ways. I almost forgot about her but then one day for whatever reason, I stumbled upon her facebook again and slowly remembered memories about her. And that quote came up. At this point, I think I was completely over her since I had met far more interesting women and had more experience with “life”. I thought to myself: “Well, being different doesn’t necessarily mean ending up the same. You don’t want to the white color doesn’t mean you will end up being black color. There are still blue, green, yellow, purple… and a lot of colors for you to choose what you want to become”. After it came up to me, I was amazed with how myself had changed in such a short time without even realizing it until that moment. Eventually to this day, I’m still obsessed with the quote or rather this whole thing. I keep it in my head to remind me of how much I can change as growing up and as a note to slow down once in a while in order to reevaluate myself and improve self-awareness.
I don’t think she remember who I am or even the fact that she wrote that herself. I would love to one day ask her what she think about it but I guess it most likely won’t happen. I like to think that every person I have met in my life all taught me something and this is by far one of the most noteworthy lesson so I guess thank you, A.
Yeah I like happy ending stories hahaha.
Goodnight, world.
9 hours left till home…
It has been a few years I have this little ritual to stay up the night before to pack my shit and listen to my “coming home playlist” that was made only for this kind of occasion.
I’m not having my casual existential crisis today so if that’s what you are looking for, you can either press “Backspace” or simply enjoy the music with me.
Cheers.
Thak you
I didn’t stop anything. Honestly, I was surprised when we ran into each other here, on a freaking sex forum. I was more surprised when you decided to reach me in such a casual way after 3 years of no communication. You turned out pretty well I must say. I like you now and I like that we talk to each other again. But this also removed the comfortableness of being anonymous that I got before. Yes, I’m that paranoid freak that trust nobody besides myself lol. Don’t worry you did nothing wrong. It’s just me. I didn’t stop writing. I just considered moving this somewhere else before I spill out too much personal shiet. Not that I have many things to hide or that I want to hide anything from you but well “curiosity is the lust of the mind” isn’t it. I will still be around but this place should be filled with more selected thoughts or should be dedicated to my sexual fantasies just as the purpose of this forum.
Goodnite, Mimi.
Like your way of thinking but obviously, language is a terrific tool of human beings in tranfering and inspring people thoughts to others, it makes great world civilization . As the result, i can understand what are you thinking and mentioning here without meeting with you in person. Its also proved that your ability of using language is so good and inspiring that it urges me to create an ID to write this bulshit things to your conner, no matter what I even dont know any single Japanese word or you damm cảre about it or not.
You are absolutely true that everyone all has random thoughts/ stuffs in mind but not everybody has courage and talent to write it down like you and that make me admire alots, lol!
You are absolutely true that everyone all has random thoughts/ stuffs in mind but not everybody has courage and talent to write it down like you and that make me admire alots, lol!
One last thing, my favorite quote in the movie
Goodnight.[/QUOTE]
Will try to spend time to watch that movie some day as your recommended coz its also one of my shared interest since i was used to be a victim of a DID and have no awareness nor proper understanding about this till now. I dont know there ảre how many identities in that biological body guy but i have been continuously wondering and questioning why i had been suffered from it. Maybe, need you to share more knowledge and actual cases to work it out if you dont mind!
I like to think that every person I have met in my life all taught me something and this is by far one of the most noteworthy lesson so I guess thank you, A.
Yeah I like happy ending stories hahaha.
Goodnight, world.[/QUOTE]
I suddenly run into you and yeah, you taught me this lesson. I have less obsessed abt my previous mentioned situation. Lesson learnt!
Looking for my happy ending, as well!
You are making it sounds like I’m a professional linguist, psychiatrist or something. Really, I’m flattered. I’m none of those but a stranger on the internet with no academic knowledge on the mentioned topic.
I wish I had the expertise to advise you on your condition but I don’t. Don’t take this seriously, but as I said, maybe it’s not “suffering” but “blessing”. Either one, it’s important that you are aware of your condition. And hopefully, if it’s the latter then you may even use it to your advantages to help you achieve your goal.
Well, with literally 5 seconds on google you should get what you are looking for, but I keep getting this question again and again so here it is..
This is kinda a word play which is made up from [TEXT] and [TROVERT] used to describe a person who feels more comfortable communicating over text than speaking face to face. Seems like it’s not an official word but I have seen native people using it quite casually.
I wouldn’t say I am exactly a “textrovert” but I do feel comfortable with writing rather than speaking, especially when it concerns sensitive topics like trying to argue whether Elon Musk is an admirable man (don’t misunderstand, big fan here xd). And the reason for that is with writing, I actually have more time to carefully pick my words to best express my opinion and also remove all the sub-factors like emotion, facial expression or body language,… leaving only informative facts on the topic. Yeah I was never good with communicating.
The word itself came into my notice when I was looking for an username for another website, not this one. I saw myself in it and decided to choose this for my internet identity since then. It’s for sure not an unique username but then again I don’t have to worry about being stalked when people put my name on google (jk lol).
Vào học tiếng anh, keep going texttrovert
Hic gì thế
I wish I had the expertise to advise you on your condition but I don’t. Don’t take this seriously, but as I said, maybe it’s not “suffering” but “blessing”. Either one, it’s important that you are aware of your condition. And hopefully, if it’s the latter then you may even use it to your advantages to help you achieve your goal.[/QUOTE]
I may make you misunderstand about my expressions. Actually, I meant i had been cheating and misconducting by a DID person, not i have that multiple identities inside my body
. So its really “suffering”, not “blessing”
))
I was aware of that situation after I couldnt find any reasons to blame for acept DID something, bla, bla…
I really admire you of what you can write and express in linguist that i can feel and know exactly what your message is, but i cant lol
I was aware of that situation after I couldnt find any reasons to blame for acept DID something, bla, bla…
I really admire you of what you can write and express in linguist that i can feel and know exactly what your message is, but i cant lol
![jnrafrv jnRAFrV.jpg](https://evyshop.vn/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/jnrafrv.jpg)
Well, dating app conversations can get deep sometimes…
You have to open yourself up and be vulnerable in order to make friends? If it were you, would you open up yourself and be vulnerable to just anyone even strangers on the internet? Me? NO thanks, I am that paranoid freak, remember?
But yeah, she got a point. You want something, you will have to take the initiative, put yourself out there and work for it.
A little motivation for the new week ahead I guess. Good luck people!
It’s been a long time…
How are you people doing?
No, actually I don’t care if you are doing well or not. I’m here because today was a long day, thanks to whoever is up there that I made it back alive. Went to bed early but can’t seem to fall asleep and it’s a little bit lonely here so guess I’m gonna write something out.
Since the last time we talked, a lot of things have happened to me. I moved to a new place which they call the most livable city in the world. Well, what I can say, not for me I guess. Leaving my home, I came here carrying my hopes and dreams of a better life, or at least that’s what mom thought it would be. You may not know this but I am an extremely ambitious person. However, I’m also a big fan of individualism and actually kinda have a thing against teamwork, networking, widening my circle or whatever you may call it. Well, as you can probably guess, I don’t have many friends. I’m very familiar with picturing myself working 16 hours a day, putting my name in the map and making people look up to me. But maybe that’s just my own way of avoiding social interaction, by keeping myself busy you know. But to be fair, I’m actually very good at it I suppose.
Anyway, I don’t want to make it sound like I’m complaining so if it does, well, I’m not gonna say sorry but you should just keep reading. Living under pressure has its good and bad. As long as you don’t break, you will move forward, faster much faster than when you were in your comfort zone. I can keep myself busy so certainly I can keep myself motivated too. If you needed that push then there it is. See you at the top, strangers.
“To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.”
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